Talenza recently hosted a webinar with Ikigai coach and expert Carly Taylor on how to use Ikigai to find meaning and purpose in daily life. This article is a summary of the presentation. You can watch the webinar here. 

If you feel like your life has little meaning and direction, you can struggle with feelings of lack of purpose. And this lack of purpose can impact all aspects of your life. 

Carly says, “People with a sense of purpose have 46% reduced risk of mortality, 13% reduction in risk of sleep problems, 43% reduced risk of depression, have higher optimism, and decreased sense of loneliness.”  

These stats demonstrate that a sense of purpose is critical for our health and longevity. The collective research on happiness and flourishing reports that the important things are a sense of purpose, living in the moment, and being socially engaged with others. 

This leads us to the Japanese concept of Ikigai. 

Ikigai is about finding meaning, purpose and fulfillment and, ultimately, flourishing in our daily lives. 

A wandering mind is an unhappy mind 

In 2010, two Harvard psychologists, Matthew Killingsworth and Daniel Gilbert performed an app-based research study to find out what makes people happy. They found that people spent more than 46.9% of their time thinking about something other than what they were doing at that moment and that mind wandering typically made them unhappy. The study concluded that rumination, worry and focusing on these thoughts were the key factors inhibiting our happiness. 

Ikigai reminds us to be present and acknowledge the moment because happiness is found by living in the moment and resisting ruminations. This research suggests a wandering mind is an unhappy mind and that a mind wandering is the cause, not the consequence, of unhappiness. 

What is Ikigai? 

If you’ve ever done online research on the concept of Ikigai, you’ll be familiar with the Venn diagram; however, this is not entirely accurate about what Ikigai is. In its true essence, Ikigai is not so much what we do but how we feel. It’s more of a mindset and a philosophy of daily living. 

The word Ikigai means ‘to live’ (Iki) and ‘worth or value’ (Gai). There is no word in the English language that is a literal translation. It’s more of a feeling you can tap into. Ikigai brings meaning and joy in life; it’s what makes life satisfying, and it can also be your hope for the future. Ikigai enables us to experience moments of feeling good about being alive. 

Ikigai can be what you’re passionate about, what keeps you going when times are tough, or used as a tool to help us connect with the things that matter to us and can increase our self-awareness. 

Mieko Kamiya, known as the Mother of Ikigai, was the first person to study the concept and write a book. In her introduction, she wrote: “People all over the world can dread the thought of waking up in the morning.” 

With that, she posed these two questions to her readers: 

• What makes us feel that life is worth living each and every day?  
• How do we find a new Ikigai if we have lost our reason to live?  

Kamiya found that the reasons for suffering came from feelings of insignificance. So, with this in mind, there are two definitions of Ikigai: 

• We have a source of Ikigai, such as “my children are my Ikigai.” 
• We have a feeling of Ikigai, such as a sense of meaning. 

5 Ways to tap into your Ikigai 

1. Get clear on your values 

If your everyday choices and attitudes align with your values - the things important to you - you can find your Ikigai. 

For example, if you have the value of being a calm, supportive and loving mother, you could feel guilt, anger, and frustration when your actions are not aligned with that value. But on the days that you live aligned with that value, no matter how challenging the kids are being, you can still feel a strong sense of Ikigai. 

Therefore, it’s about living your values through the good and bad and allowing them to be your compass, so that you choose your responses and behaviour aligned with your values. 

Here is a great exercise to get clear on what your values are:  

Imagine you are 90 years old and looking back on your life today.  

Complete these sentences:  

• I spent too much time worrying about.... 
• I didn’t spend enough time doing things like ….  
• If I could go back in time, what I’d do differently from today onwards is...  

Set aside some time to answer these questions because they’ll reveal what’s important to you and often the things we neglect because we’re so busy day-to-day. Is there room to trade off some things that are not meaningful to you, so you’re then able to do things that are meaningful and worthwhile? 

Action: Reflect and clarify your values, both how you want to treat yourself and others. Watch the full webinar to gain insights and examples of values. 

2. Start small 

To start discovering your Ikigai is to start small. The small joys in everyday life result in a more fulfilling and meaningful life. We’re often chasing what we perceive as success, like money, a nice car, or the latest phone, but all the things we want and aspire to have tend not to create meaning in our lives beyond that short rush when purchasing them. 

Finding your Ikigai in the small things in life can be a hobby, sport, or even savouring each sip of your morning coffee. You can find it in your work, your pets, or your children. Ikigai is found when we stop and notice the joy in the things that are important to us in our lives. 

Action: Think about the small things in your life that bring you joy, meaning and satisfaction and start doing more of them. 

3. Do things properly 

‘Chanto’ is the Japanese word that means to do things diligently or properly, and it is another way to feel Ikigai. This can relate to the tasks you do or your interactions with others. The Japanese are renowned for their attention to detail and the precision and care they put into things. 

Using ‘Chanto’ brings us into the moment because our focus is on the here and now, helping us get out of our heads. Even the most mundane tasks can give your life purpose and help you feel Ikigai. 

Action: Do everyday tasks, like washing the dishes, with care and consciousness. Don’t give in to the distraction inside your head. 

4. Understand your relationships with others 

Your relationships are a source of Ikigai. Understanding our role in our relationships can help us better handle the challenges that come with them. Doing things for others can bring on the feeling of Ikigai, so think about how you can serve others and make a positive impact. 

Try this self-reflection exercise to tap into your Ikigai and relationships: 

Naikan is a regular journaling exercise that you can use as a method of self-reflection to widen your perspective of your life and relationships. 

Ask yourself:  

• What have I received from...  
• What have I given, what have I done for... 
• What troubles and difficulties have I caused... 

What you give to and receive from others can give you incredible insight into your impact on others and what they have on you. 

Action: Reflect on your relationships by completing this exercise. Watch the full webinar to gain insights and examples. 

5. Do more of the things that are worth doing 

Another way to tap into your Ikigai is called Yarigai – the things in your life that are worth doing. So what are the things in your life worth doing but you are not doing because it feels too hard? Maybe it’s getting up half an hour earlier to exercise or cleaning up when you can’t be bothered. 

Author and Ikigai expert Nick Kemp suggests: “To generate more feelings of Ikigai, it’s better to frame things as is it worth doing or not worth doing rather than evaluating opportunities as enjoyable, difficult or unpleasant.” 

Action: A ritual board is a great tool to start doing more things that feel worthwhile. Make a list, and tick off the things you’ve done each day. For examples, watch the full webinar. 

In summary, Ikigai can bring you incredible fulfilment daily, leading to a flourishing life. It’s one of those things you can deliberately bring into your life, even when times are tough. If you can find your Ikigai, whatever that means for you, you can draw on it when you need it most. And it can help you find some space to look at life through a different lens and widen your perspective. 

Ikigai can bring you a sense of purpose. You can find it in day-to-day things, which can have a massive impact on your mood, relationships, and wellbeing. 

Watch the full webinar here

About Carly Taylor 

Carly Taylor is a Mental Fitness Coach who uses an integrated mind-body-brain approach to assist people in effectively managing the inevitable challenges that life throws at them. She does this through empowering evidence-based psychological strategies and tools combined with positive lifestyle practices in mindset, sleep, exercise, and nutrition.

Carly is certified in Japanese Psychology, ACT (Acceptance & Commitment Therapy), Ikigai Coaching, and Health Coaching, and is a university-qualified Nutritionist and member of HCANZA. She is also doing her Master's Degree in Counselling. Find out more at: https://www.carlytaylorcoaching.com.au